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“Kindness: Loaning someone your strength instead of reminding them of their weakness.” 

People sometimes confuse kindness with softness, or lack of strength.

Sometimes, being kind demands that you summon your strength in order to display it.  In fact, being kind requires strength in order to muster it under certain circumstances.

You can be firm, and still be kind.

You can be direct, and still be kind.

You can express irritation and still be kind about it.

And, as always, the way to become kind, not just do kind things, is to practice with yourself, because, as somebody smart once said, “you can’t give away what you don’t own.”

Never ceases to amaze me how many folks are downright mean to themselves.

Oh, you might not hear the words actually come out of their mouth—lots of people practice ‘smile therapy—but the mean words roll ‘round their brains. I know; I’m a professional brain-picker and hear clients’ mean thoughts on a regular basis.

Would you berate your best friend the way you berate yourself?

Ellen DeGeneres closes her daily talk show with the admonition to “be kind to one another.”

Here’s what I tell my clients: Be kind to yourself.

Because if you’re not kind to you, it’s kind of hard to be kind to others, especially when they piss you off or let you down.

Which is kind of when it matters most.

“Kindness can become its own motive. We are made kind by being kind.” ~Eric Hoffer

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